Lit.Org - a community for readers and writers Advanced Search
 




Average Rating
10

(1 votes)


RatingRated by
10Teflon

You must login to vote

On benches of ledge jutting into the stream
They teeter in coveralls
Tiny shoes kicked off at the edge, in the sand
With matchbox and baby-dolls

He calls from the bridge, let ‘em go, so they do
With a “one,” and “two, three, GO!”
The frogs that they caught are put into the boats
And swept by the trickling flow

Cut quick to the path and run straight to the bridge
With giggles, a squeal and shout
To watch them arriving; see whose frog’s the best;
“Mine’s first and didn’t jump out!”

Again to the path; where the stream takes a turn
“Oh, hurry to catch the boats!”
And now off to the bog, to catch a new frog
“Next time, I’m the one who gloats!”

4/15/05


------
Here, I share, with stark honesty, my life.


Related Items

Comments

The following comments are for "Frogfest"
by Feliciastone

festive

Good clean muddy fun. I wonder how many kids get this kind of experience today as opposed to video games. The creek of my youth was more minnows and crawfish, but fond memories nevertheless.

( Posted by: drsoos [Member] On: April 22, 2005 )

Jessica, Demeter, Soos
Hello good people :)

My kids used to do this at the old farmhouse where we lived when they were all small. The back of the property was bordered by a stream - it was wonderful.

One of the only candid pictures I have of all of them together is on that bridge, smiling faces looking at the camera, all fanned out like a hand of cards.

I drove by the old place the other day after writing this piece when an errand took me by the old "neighborhood". I saw that the bridge had been replaced and the stream had taken a somewhat newer course. (It made me feel old).

Jessica - My parents collected frog figurines too, until our home was nearly a frog museum. My father is French, and the frog is kind of a mascot, if you know what I mean.

Demeter - We used to catch tadpoles too, in the wetlands behind our house, growing up. We used to call it "the frog pond", and it seemed so huge. Now it's a dried up mud puddle at the side of the baseball field. Isn't time fun?!

Soos, I introduced my stepson to mud this spring. There was a time when he wouldn't even use the bathroom without a gameboy in his hand, he would have a tantrum if he couldn't find it. But, I can't remember the last time he even asked for it. Mud rules!

Thanks for reading and commenting.

Felicia

( Posted by: feliciastone [Member] On: April 22, 2005 )

findin frogs
Your comment of memories was as lovely as this poem-
A picture was painted here; a Norman Rockwell, I think.
I live in the country currently, and at this time of year have a continous froggy serenade...
Hope the room is done, sounds like your having fun with that little one-
blessings,
Elizabeth

( Posted by: emaks [Member] On: April 22, 2005 )

Emaks - memories
Thank you for your generous comment here. Thanks, always for stopping by and reading my work - it makes all the difference to hear others' reactions to a piece.

As for Kyle's bedroom... we have engineered some new and interesting changes to the layout and my husband was sleeping in the next room (days), so things were slowed up on that project a bit.

But, I took the week off and did some landscaping in the front of our home. Kyle has been working on his garden, too, and we are sanding his bench for a fresh coat of paint.
It's been a great week. We even visited our "special place" where the water is so high still, that it covers all our cool sitting places.

Spring has finally sprung!

Thanks again,

Paula

( Posted by: feliciastone [Member] On: April 22, 2005 )

Paula
My pleasure- I agree ego stroking is a necessary part of this art. It is easy to stroke yours as I always enjoy your words.
Glad all is well-
E

( Posted by: emaks [Member] On: April 22, 2005 )

Tiny shoes
I appreciate what you are conveying in this poem, but I don't think it conveys completely what you wanted to say. For me, it's a little too idyllic. But it's quite a fetching poem.

( Posted by: gomarsoap [Member] On: April 22, 2005 )

Gomarsoap - I smiled
I smiled when I read your comment.

Windchime had commented on "In the Paint-peeled Cottage" in a similar way. She said she was suspicious of such as place as portrayed in my poem.

She thought I was describing a place where people pay to spend time there to feel better about themselves and that she felt (paraphrasing from memory)she didn't think things were so bad that people couldn't find this without a place like that. (It was too idyllic a place.)

However, I was describing my own kitchen in the old farm house and the different people who had crossed our paths throughout our lives. We met some of the people I described, at other times in our lives - not when we lived in the old farm house - but the relationships were the same as described in the poem (in the country kitchen) - some of the conversations took place in other kitchens in homes we lived in.

We lived a very hard life during the years at the old house, and had our share of challenges. But, the kids were oblivious to what it was for me. Despite the hard work, those were happy times for our little family.

Playing in the stream, and all the things I did with my kids during those years, was about providing them with a seemingly adyllic life, where frolicing in the stream was what we did to build the happy memories I feel every child deserves.

Sure, they had their share of helping in the garden and other chores, but there's no place for it in this poem, nor was there a place for it during our hours of carefree fun.

How sad to live in a world where simple, wholesome pleasures seem idyllic.

Thanks so much for reading and commenting. I always like to hear what you have to say. Thanks, also, for your comments on my "Exposed" interview.

Felicia

( Posted by: feliciastone [Member] On: April 23, 2005 )

Froggy Felicia
I hear Streisand singing *Memories*. I don't care for her much, but I surely like this poem. I grew up with those critters in my cut-off bluejean shorts pockets.
Good work,
williamhill

( Posted by: williamhill [Member] On: April 23, 2005 )

amphibious landing
Hi felicia. I like the frog-boat racing story here but I'm having a little trouble picking up the rythmn and meter of this rhyme. You know, I just read it again and finally got it. That definately improved the flow. I liked the feeling and imagery here. You captured that sense of fun and delight. I could hear squeals of pleasure and cries of frustration ringing out. I wonder how many princes there were amongst them?
cheers
mick

( Posted by: smithy [Member] On: April 23, 2005 )

William - you too?
It seems that frogs are one of those creatures you find in almost every town?

You had 'em in your pockets? I once found a tiny frog spread eagle, stuck postrate against the tub wall of the washing machine. When I asked about it, Jason said, "Oh that's where that went! I forgot it in my pocket."

Thanks for reading and commenting.

Felicia

( Posted by: feliciastone [Member] On: April 23, 2005 )

Smithy - flow
I agree that this one doesn't flow naturally, even if the meter and rythm are there.

I'm partial to the poems that slide off the reader's tongue at first visit, and this is not one of them.

Perhaps it was a little bit forced. I had been roused from my sleep with a grewsome nightmare and I got up and wrote a poem about it ("Let them Sleep Soundly"). Then, I felt like I needed to produce something real and "up" (I guess I was trying to balance out the Yin and the Yang.)

These were fond memories, so I pulled this one out to serve the purpose. I also wrote Mr. Ding-a-ling that morning - about the icecream truck. (Yes, it took two poems to balance out the darkness in the nightmare poem.)

As always, thanks for taking the time to visit my post and give some feedback.

I appreciate you!

Felicia

( Posted by: feliciastone [Member] On: April 23, 2005 )

Frogs
F - great imagery! Nice little snapshot of innocence and so on. I read it first, paying little attention to the rhyme scheme. Later, when I read it at a speed suiting your rhyme scheme, it didn't feel as nice. Just a personal thing, is all. Good work!


Andy

( Posted by: strangedaze [Member] On: April 23, 2005 )

Andy - frogs n all
Thanks for stopping in to read this one. I agree - the flow isn't it's strong suit.

See ya around lit,

Felicia

( Posted by: feliciastone [Member] On: April 23, 2005 )

Frogs...
For some reason this reminded me of my cats catching frogs in the garden, ever heard them scream? Ugh what a noise!! I imagined my oldest cat was the narrator of this piece and it made me laugh.

Great work it really goes on journey

A :-)

( Posted by: londongrey [Member] On: April 23, 2005 )

Londongrey

Cats yes, frogs, no.... but our lab loved to catch frogs. It was very "Animal Planet" if you know what I mean.

I'm glad this piece made people stop for a minute and remember something a little different.

I am trying to get away from only writing poetry as therapy so to speak, and broaden my horizons a little. Granted, the emotional pieces have a certain hold on the reader.

My upcoming posts will be quite varied (hopefully).

Thanks for reading and commenting.

Felicia

( Posted by: feliciastone [Member] On: April 23, 2005 )





Add Your Comment

You Must be a member to post comments and ratings. If you are NOT already a member, signup now it only takes a few seconds!

All Fields are required

Commenting Guidelines:
  • All comments must be about the writing. Non-related comments will be deleted.
  • Flaming, derogatory or messages attacking other members well be deleted.
  • Adult/Sexual comments or messages will be deleted.
  • All subjects MUST be PG. No cursing in subjects.
  • All comments must follow the sites posting guidelines.
The purpose of commenting on Lit.Org is to help writers improve their writing. Please post constructive feedback to help the author improve their work.


Username:
Password:
Subject:
Comment:





Login:
Password: