Lit.Org - a community for readers and writers Advanced Search

Average Rating

(0 votes)

You must login to vote

Falling into darkness
left here to rot.
It was you
who lead me here.

Did I not smile
and hold you up.
When you
where at your weakest.

Of all the people
in this world.
Its you
who holds the knife.

Look at me!!
See Me!!
Watch these sorrowed eyes!!
It was you
who did this.

All I ask is...


Watch a falling comet,
Jump up and bop it.
Dance with a hobbit,
and leave me a comment.

Related Items


The following comments are for "Why?"
by BelovedGreatWolf

Your poem was well “BLUNT” an to the point, well for anyone whose been in love we’ve all been through it! Your poem brought back some unwanted memories but I can clearly see that you were getting your emotions out as you wrote this…

( Posted by: Aranis32 [Member] On: April 16, 2005 )

Thanks for the commment Aranis 32. I'm happy that my poem though "Blunt" made you think. And I just want you to know that this poem has NOTHING to do with getting out of a relationship. I did not write this poem cause a girlfreind dumped me. This is a poem simply on betrayal and has nothing to do with a sad little me crying over my ex.

( Posted by: BelovedGreatWolf [Member] On: April 18, 2005 )

Great Wolf

Today I find myself baffled overall. In reading this before I thought it WAS a relationship poem. Now that I hear you say it is merely betrayal, I think it must be closer to family. It is written with such strong emotion that it must be over something or someone who occupies a great space in your life. I would, then, work on a way to make that point more obvious. The expressive strength is there.

( Posted by: GibsonGirl [Member] On: April 18, 2005 ) tell you the truth
I don't know where I got this poem from. One day in Math class I just started writing it. I do this alot. I Just picture myself in a situation and try to feel the way that person would feel. You reminded me that I once wrote a ryming poem about someone who lost their best freind. One of my friends at school read the poem and told me there were sorry for me. This was because they thought the poem was about a real friend.

( Posted by: BelovedGreatWolf [Member] On: April 20, 2005 )

Add Your Comment

You Must be a member to post comments and ratings. If you are NOT already a member, signup now it only takes a few seconds!

All Fields are required

Commenting Guidelines:
  • All comments must be about the writing. Non-related comments will be deleted.
  • Flaming, derogatory or messages attacking other members well be deleted.
  • Adult/Sexual comments or messages will be deleted.
  • All subjects MUST be PG. No cursing in subjects.
  • All comments must follow the sites posting guidelines.
The purpose of commenting on Lit.Org is to help writers improve their writing. Please post constructive feedback to help the author improve their work.