Lit.Org - a community for readers and writers Advanced Search
 




Average Rating
0.00

(0 votes)

You must login to vote

It tears me down day by day until there is nothing left
It hides in the shadows and stalks me every where

No matter where I go no matter who I am with it hides
In the shadows and in the trees watching for its chance

Waiting till I cannot push it back, back into the dark

Then it gets his chance it is just a flicker in my eye;
Then I lose control from my toes to my finger tips

Raving mad and out of control it is enjoying the power
It leaves a trail of pain and it doesn’t want to slow

Then when it is time to face the music it is gone
It slips quick and sleek back, back into the darkness



Related Items

Comments

The following comments are for "Shadow…"
by poetfreak

tap5000
Any time you have suggestions for my writing please let me know.

PoetFreak

( Posted by: poetfreak [Member] On: April 13, 2005 )

I can relate
Love finds us all and always makes us vulnerable. Comparing love to a shadow is so fitting. Iwould like you to read my lyrics "I blame You" I think you will understand them, great work
Sean Micheals

( Posted by: SeanMicheals [Member] On: April 14, 2005 )

Rage personified
One point that I think would help: you've referred to your shadow as both it and he. I think it would be better to stick with one

Your nemesis, made real and lurking in the shadows. Waiting for the opportunity to push you beyond control. Wonderful imagery and nicely done. I enjoyed this. -Philo

( Posted by: philo [Member] On: April 14, 2005 )

Philo
Philo as always it is good to hear your imput. I didnt relize I changed the name I was refering to it as I will fix it thanks again.

PoetFreak

( Posted by: poetfreak [Member] On: April 14, 2005 )

Me again
Well I like the emagry alot! It was well wrtien refreing to love as a shawdow is somethingI never would have thought of doing! But...I think that you did a really good job!
heartbreakersbeware

( Posted by: heartbreakersbeware [Member] On: May 13, 2005 )

Shadow...
Thank you for the input it is always useful.

PoetFreak

( Posted by: poetfreak [Member] On: May 16, 2005 )





Add Your Comment

You Must be a member to post comments and ratings. If you are NOT already a member, signup now it only takes a few seconds!

All Fields are required

Commenting Guidelines:
  • All comments must be about the writing. Non-related comments will be deleted.
  • Flaming, derogatory or messages attacking other members well be deleted.
  • Adult/Sexual comments or messages will be deleted.
  • All subjects MUST be PG. No cursing in subjects.
  • All comments must follow the sites posting guidelines.
The purpose of commenting on Lit.Org is to help writers improve their writing. Please post constructive feedback to help the author improve their work.


Username:
Password:
Subject:
Comment:





Login:
Password: