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And as the moment
swells like an
oceans promise

They, they
walk by

Like clouds flirting
with the Jersey Shore,
they are lost, lost
in the moment

And as one promise,
leads to yet, another
promise

The moment, is lost
Lost?
lost forever and ever,
and, ever.......




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The following comments are for "Jersey Shore"
by 0207070

I like..
the image of clouds flirting and such but the massive amount of ...'s at the end kinda made me say the ending was bordering near the area of cliche.

( Posted by: ryangilr0y [Member] On: March 17, 2005 )

Jersey shore
I loved "swells like an ocean promise"


Felicia

( Posted by: feliciastone [Member] On: March 18, 2005 )

020707 - Help me
I feel like I am missing the point of the last two verses.

Felicia

( Posted by: feliciastone [Member] On: March 18, 2005 )

020707
If you lose half the words and "stuttering," then fix grammar, there may remain a start to something? I like "clouds flirting" with shoreline idea.

Keep writing,
B

( Posted by: Bobby7L [Member] On: March 19, 2005 )

Jersey curiosity
Would that be Jersey, USA or Jersey, CI?

( Posted by: A. Cain [Member] On: March 20, 2005 )

Good question..
seeing it from the Garden State aspect I do think it is NJ in good ole US of A.

( Posted by: ryangilr0y [Member] On: March 23, 2005 )





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