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I shall miss the winds that blow
Across the silent evening snow
And the lonely swaying of the pine
And the birch that move together in line.

And I shall miss the looming moon
And it's silent moody little tune
That carries the whistle of the wind
And the dry leaves that tumble in.

I will remember the nights I walked
And my little inward thoughtful talks
Whenever my conscience bothered be
The moon was there to counsel me.

And I could not forget the stars
That seemed to play a little farce
As they danced across the moonlit sky
And cast their light back in my eyes.

But tonight there was a different chill
And the air was very warm and still
I knew that spring was on her way
And the gray quickly fading to day

As I slowly began to roam
Back again towards my home
The birds began to sweetly sing
For, they could feel the coming of spring.

So long to you my gentle friend
After all we will meet again
After the last gray goose does call
And the show of snow warms us all.



------
~Donna J

--------
Do not look back in anger, or forward in fear, but around in awareness. -James Thurber



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Comments

The following comments are for "A Winter Farewell"
by DonnaJ

really damn good
great poem

( Posted by: FangChen [Member] On: January 12, 2005 )

easy tune
Donna~

You present this rhyming poem with such an easy grace, it's enough to make me forget that I usually don't like this type of poem. This is reminiscent of Frost, one of my favorite American Poets. All in all, this is excellent work.

I do have a few minor suggestions.

1.Second line, second stanza it's should be its. I make that mistake myself from time to time.

2. I'm no expert but the meter seems a bit awkward in the second pairing of lines in the fifth and sixth stanzas.

Beyond those two minor quibbles, I still loved this poem and the sentiment behind it. Although as a Southern boy, I have a hate/hate relationship with winter.

Bart

( Posted by: Bartleby [Member] On: January 12, 2005 )

Puurrrfection
How good is this one Donna. I love the smoothness and natural flow in it. I have some glitches but they are only things I notice when the poem is close to perfect - honest. ~smile~

Hope you don't mind. Chuck me out if you do!
.
S1 - last line, I'd lose 'together,' better rhythm, implied anyway.

S2&3 - I'd lose little, they both spoil the flow and don't add anything.

S4 - did you change tense or is it just the way I'm reading it?

S6 - last line, Lose 'of', awkward.

only little things that I only notice when everything else is so good. Hope this was welcome and helpful. thank you for a lovely poem. This is my kind of stuff. warm regards huni.

( Posted by: Huni [Member] On: January 13, 2005 )

Lady in the White Gown
How rare it is to long for winter and to wax melancholy at her passing. Aside from shoveling snow, I feel the same way.

I could almost feel the quiet as the winter began to slip away which is especially wonderful for me as I live in a city now and don't often get that sense anymore. Very pretty. -Philo

( Posted by: Philo [Member] On: January 13, 2005 )





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