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My Temptation for you, I can't control, How I desire you, I feel it in my Soul. I want you so much, Need you so bad, You're every single dream, That I've ever had. We both are taken, But we still feel it our heart, The temptation is Real, And now it's too late for it to stop. The desire I see in your eyes, The Love I feel from your heart, Your emotions has soared, And cannot stop. You want me by your side, To share your every dream, You're tried of hiding, You're ready for our love to be seen. Well I'm at your side, And ready to share your dreams, I don't want to hide, So let it be seen. I love you, My Darling, And I want the world to know, You're my Everything, And I need you so. The tempation got us, And made us fall in Love, I have no regrets, I'll always be your precious Dove!



The following comments are for "Temptation"
by Stareyes

StarEyes Poem
Yes, here is a familiar topic. This seems like a piece that needs you to spend a little more time on it. I think you have a lot of lines in here that have been said before, and they are just not flowing in to each other or out of each other. It really needs to be broken into lines, as well. Written this way makes it 'sound' monotonous. I really think it has potential for improvement.


( Posted by: GibsonGirl [Member] On: December 31, 2004 )

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