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10PETERPAULINO

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With all the things I wanted to say
shoved down,
and all the things I should have said
buried under them...

It is no wonder to me
you left without saying anything apologetic
for the way we existed
really without reason.

I had hoped you would come to me
find me, completely understanding my tears
coax the things I wanted to say forth,
then listen to the things I should have said
and apologized for your selfishness.

But you left without caring
that you left,
that you never arrived
in the first place.


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The following comments are for "The Way We Existed"
by TamiJane

last 2 lines
are very very sad. Are they just meeting up in cyberspace, is that what the lines say? The sadness of this pulled me down again...

( Posted by: PETERPAULINO [Member] On: December 1, 2004 )

last 2 lines
He might as well have been in cyberspace, but he was very present. He was emotionally absent the whole time I knew him, and I couldn't bring myself to admit it until he walked away.

( Posted by: TamiJane [Member] On: December 2, 2004 )

TamiJane
You have done something that is often hard to do. Written a well crafted poem from an incident that is your own experience. It is authentic while still a really good piece. Lovely to read, well done, regards huni.

( Posted by: Huni [Member] On: December 3, 2004 )

Thanks
Huni,
I really appreciate your comments, thank you for taking the time to express them. Looking forward to reading more of your work.

( Posted by: TamiJane [Member] On: December 4, 2004 )





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