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8Demeter
10Thinspiration

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flowers are beautiful,
and she could look circles around pansies.
just by batting an eyelash
showing the world what flowers can't be.

we people are cold,
im noticing as we get old.
we're still holding on
to moulding formed in childhood.
where flowers can't grow.

staring is contageous between
lovers and strangers.
yet in the mind it's a far cry between
pleasures and dangers.

she leaves me no choice,
but to grasp for her meaning.
clasp the bitter thorns agian
like broken glass causing bleeding.


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Comments

The following comments are for "girls..."
by IlichVladikov

your poem.
this is both dazzling and heartrending at the same time. the transition from first to last stanza is like some ecclesiastical quarantine, albeit being trapped and surrounded by perfection.

( Posted by: inundatedgrace [Member] On: November 11, 2004 )

My favorite expression
Flowers with thorns causing one to bleed.
I have over 1,946 poems written in journals. And I bet in at least 50 of them there is reference to bloody thorns. I dunno. I just love that analogy. Cool write. :-) BTW, your picture looks like a clone of one of my best friends in highschool. He was 2 years younger than me, completely insane yet one of the funnest people Ive ever known. I have no idea what kind of person you are, but the fact you remind me of someone I think is cool, is enough to make me want to find out.

( Posted by: Thinspiration [Member] On: November 12, 2004 )

funny...
I might not be 2 years younger then you, but i am quite crazy, i use poetry to consume time so i don't do anything stupid, and my friends think i am funny, what i've learned from meeting people online, there is always someone like me in everytown.

( Posted by: IlichVladikov [Member] On: November 12, 2004 )

Dead Ringer
I just developed the line "I am a dead ringer for noone" yet I remind someone of someone else wherever I go. A friend or someone's sister. Threads.

Ilich: I get your work, I really feel I do. I enjoy it immensely, and I look forward to reading more. I love the first stanza. I will help you with "Mouldings". You mean "fit the mold" as in artistic creation, so you may have wanted to say "holding on to molds..." or "fitting molds" or something similar. The spelling of your version means wall-trimmings, and I know you'd want to know that. I really don't care about typos and spell check bullshit since poems were being written and spoken since before such crafty inventions as computers. So keep up your great work, and keep posting it so I can keep consuming it!

Lans

( Posted by: GibsonGirl [Member] On: November 12, 2004 )





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