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I want to die for the world,
But if the world
Won't be gorgeous,
Better I stay
And help in making
The world a better place.

------
God bless all writers for they are the image of God.

When you insult a writer, you'er not doing the best for him.But when you correct him, you're a good friend.
Cheers !

Odimegwu Onwumere


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Comments

The following comments are for "WORLD DEATH"
by Princeo

Princeo
Beautiful sentiment and I agree, I think you're better off staying where you can do more good.

I suggest taking another look at line 3, 'Won't be gorgeous.' Gorgeous is a word usually reserved for the way something looks rather than the state of how something 'is.' For example, you might describe a very beautiful woman or an exquisite flower as gorgeous, but you wouldn't describe the financial affairs of a company as gorgeous.

You could use 'wonderful' or a similar word, but I suggest:

'But if the world
Wouldn't improve,
better I stay' etc... or something similar to this.

I hope this helps. -Philo

( Posted by: Philo [Member] On: November 10, 2004 )





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