Lit.Org - a community for readers and writers Advanced Search
 




Average Rating
5.5

(2 votes)


RatingRated by
10frenchie
1Viper9

You must login to vote

“Track 3”

There she is
Doesn’t she look so lovely
If I asked her to dance
Do you think she’d say yes?
Do you think that I’ve got a chance?
If I could I would
I’d grab the sun right out of the sky
And ignore the burns
From the hot, hot fire
Like the fire that she ignites in my soul
I would give it to her as a gift
But I wouldn’t let her touch it
Because I don’t want her to get hurt
Or burn her beautiful hands
I would build
An aquarium type room
Where she could put the sun
And look at it whenever she wanted to
Her long blond hair
Her smile her eyes
She makes me feel like I could fly
Or cure cancer
Or maybe even aids
Yeah, that’d be great
Oh look at this boy
He’s got so many scars
He he’s been hurt
And he’s been down
But she makes that all go away
Yeah she makes that all go away
This boy may be obsessed
Or he maybe whipped
But that’s okay because she is worth it
I want to spend tonight with her
And tomorrow night
And the night after that
On into eternity
If I play this song for you
Will you dance for me
I will play this song for you
Laying out my feelings for you
To look at like photographs
Laying out on display on the floor
Wandering around my feelings for you
So in love that its a bit chaotic
Can you read it in this song?
But this is how I feel about you
What about you?



------
jimmy g--do you see my heart? it is lying on the floor.


Related Items

Comments

The following comments are for "Track 3"
by JimmyAndHisRocket

Argh!
PLEASE do not ever be whipped... Can't stand a man who doesn't think for himself. Other than that your work was special and wonderful, as usual! I especially liked

"I will play this song for you
Laying out my feelings for you
To look at like photographs
Laying out on display on the floor"

Simply lovely.

( Posted by: frenchie [Member] On: November 2, 2004 )





Add Your Comment

You Must be a member to post comments and ratings. If you are NOT already a member, signup now it only takes a few seconds!

All Fields are required

Commenting Guidelines:
  • All comments must be about the writing. Non-related comments will be deleted.
  • Flaming, derogatory or messages attacking other members well be deleted.
  • Adult/Sexual comments or messages will be deleted.
  • All subjects MUST be PG. No cursing in subjects.
  • All comments must follow the sites posting guidelines.
The purpose of commenting on Lit.Org is to help writers improve their writing. Please post constructive feedback to help the author improve their work.


Username:
Password:
Subject:
Comment:





Login:
Password: