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For an instant, I was happy again,
old miseries were a shadow left far behind,
quietly receding into seclusion without complaint.

For an instant, I had been happy;
only one pair of eyes were visible amongst the others,
everyone else’s words were a soft murmur.

Then we parted ways,
but that instant had not yet passed.
It was clinging to transmuted hope.

Later, on the way home, I bought a Sprite from a street vendor.
I handed the seller a crisp $20, and looked around me for a second.
A moment later, he waved a wrinkled $10 and asked if that’s what I had given him,
for he had to make change.

“Yes” I said, “I trust you”.

For an instant, I had been happy.
Now, I’m ripped off.


------
-=[ Blank this intentional space! ]=-


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Comments

The following comments are for "Instantanaeity!"
by ak7raplt

well...
It started off well- sounded like a good poem. Then it turned into a story, and didn't work at all with the theme that it started with. It went from ethreal love across a crowded room to... getting ripped off buying a Sprite. It doesn't fit. Either the second half needs to be less real, or the first half more real.

( Posted by: SWHCgirl [Member] On: April 24, 2002 )

ak7raplt
I, like the others, thought this started out as a love poem. But then you seemed to wonder off the main topic and decided to tell a story. More importantly, and irrelevant story of you buying a Sprite from a street vendor. The story line needs to go in order to convey a mood.

Mr. E

( Posted by: Mr. E [Member] On: April 25, 2002 )

Hrm
Hrm. I guess my point didn't get across. I was about to crash the other night & this just poured out of my head. See, to me it made sense. It wasn't that it's supposed to be a love poem, it isn't supposed to be a story. I guess I wrote it as a shot of reality; a rude awakening. All in all, poems are stories, and some stories are, in a way, poetic. I see no reason to adhere to long-established norms.

I think Jessicam had it right: my day started out a love story & ended up a bad joke. Hence, I used both methods to explain it.
-ak

( Posted by: ak7raplt [Member] On: April 25, 2002 )

ak7raplt
Well, you're either telling a story about buying Sprite or of love. I originally thought that you were eyeing the vender but then thought to myself, nah, that can't be right.

-MJ

( Posted by: mj20300 [Member] On: April 25, 2002 )





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