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I keep the books beside my bed
and silent wishes in my head
that when I wake to morning red
that somehow then you won't be dead

I read the books that profess the skill
to contact those no longer ill
for skills to reach beyond the still
beyond the grasp of Deathly chill

I watch the shows on every night
that talk about those in The Light
and I wonder still just how I might
change past events and make things right

I pay the gypsies to let me talk
to you wherever you may walk
Ignoring those who point and mock
my patience times to no one's clock

I pray myself to sleep and dream
that things are not what they might seem
that somehow your life I will redeem
I send these prayers on each moonbeam

I see your face in strangers passing
I hear your voice in echoes flashing
And all the while my sins rehashing
But each day hope is slowly dashing

Daddy, daddy best friend of mine
If only I had known your time
had come so quickly how I was blind
The guilt is burning in my mind

I keep the books there by my bed
and silent wishes in my head
that when I wake to morning red
that somehow, somehow you won't be dead

All that we see or seem, is but a dream within a dream....
Edgar Allen Poe

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The following comments are for "Unreality"
by poesandpoetry

Old school
This is a great poem. It reads like a chant, an incantation or a prayer. Regret, longing, guilt, sadness, desparation, disbelief and hope all shine through in this.

I have a suggestion for the sixth stanza: Passed (or past), flashed, rehashed, and dashed. I think these lines may benefit from a more abrupt ending. The "ing" seemed to soft to me and "dashed" seems to work better at the end.

But thats minor stuff. I liked this very much. -Philo

( Posted by: Philo [Member] On: October 19, 2004 )

Philo, I think you are right, I think it would have been better that way - more past tense. Thank you for commenting.

( Posted by: poesandpoetry [Member] On: October 20, 2004 )

this is an excellent poem. I enjoyed the flow and rhyme. minor pick with "somehow " in 5th stanza. it interrupts rhythm a bit. "someway" or?


( Posted by: williamhill [Member] On: October 23, 2004 )

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