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10Char
10Teflon

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Yet another abuse of the haiku form.
Composed many moons ago,the waking dream of an hallucinogenic,narcoleptic detective.

Negatives akimbo...
A construct of resolute environs
Burned the evidence in my sleep.


------
Beware the lollipop of mediocrity-
Lick it once and you suck forever.


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The following comments are for "protocol"
by metrozol

leptictective
Claire,thanx again for your input.Yeah,I too had to snicker after I read what I wrote in the intro.
Almost a tongue-twister."Unusual" and surprise"
are exactly the kinds of effects I was hoping to
elicit with this piece. Glad you enjoyed it.

( Posted by: metrozol [Member] On: October 19, 2004 )

Great Write Met
I agree with Claire on the preamble; it set it off nicely. Also, if this were an acrostic, your basi word would be NAB. I like that also. You have an acrostic haiku, if there is such a thing. If not, I think you just invented it. Good going.

Always,
Char

( Posted by: Char [Member] On: October 19, 2004 )

Char,what the...?!
Hmmm...velly intellestink. I've seen acrostics in newspapers before but I never really looked into them enough to understand exactly what was going on. Now that you mentioned it,I did notice the
word BED directly underneath the 'b' in 'akimbo'.
Or does it only apply to the first letter of each line? Anyway,thanks for checking me out again,I
get a kick out of your responses. Most of my work is unfinished so it's gonna be slow in coming,but
I promise more of the same madness,only different,
gnome sane?

( Posted by: metrozol [Member] On: October 19, 2004 )

gnoyes...LOL!!!
What a riot you are!!!! I missed the bed one...LOL!!! Got ya lookin' there, don't I Met?? On a more serious note, yes, I am almost sure acrostic has to be with the beginning letter of each line. I meant to say (but made a typo) that your basic word is NAB. I have been away from here for a bit or I would have responded sooner to this. I am glad I stopped in tonight...you made me laugh. Keep up the great work. I am looking forward to more. Thanks. :)

Always,
Char

( Posted by: Char [Member] On: October 23, 2004 )





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