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I was sitting by the window with a wine glass in my hand. I was drunk not from alcohol but from the sorrows of my life. Looking back to my life I see the broken fragments of each dream, each promise and each love. I felt so lonely. The was no one I can turn to. And silently my tears began to pour. The night was as dark as my life is but as I looked up to the moonless sky, I saw the first star of the night. I closed my eyes and spoke the words I had known since I was young.

"Star light, Star bright,
First star I see tonight.
Wish I may, Wish I might,
Have this wish I wish tonight."

The wind blew from my lips the wish I whispered. I opened my eyes and looked at my star and saw it wink at me and then smiled with so much joy, brightly lighting up the dark sky and my dreary life along with it. I began to hear the comforting voice of He who never left my side. My chest felt lighter and I felt so free as God's message gently seeped into my heart emersing it with love and joy.

It didn't matter anymore that I get my wish fulfilled because at that moment I knew that God had granted the one thing my heart wished for. At last, I realized what the only I needed to get through life was. I found that deep inside my heart, I still believed that I can still hope for tomorrow, hope for a better day. To believe that the sun will rise again after a long peaceful sleep. And with each sunrise is the promise of a whole new day when I can forget everything I did wrong the other day, start anew and make a better person of myself.

And from the night on, I looked up to the sky each night to see the first star of the night. I have thought of it as a guide in my life as I try to remind myself to never lose hope. It reminded me when three of the world's wisest men also followed a star with hope burning in their hearts as they came from far away and searched for the baby Jesus. And after a long journey, they found Christ Jesus, the King above kings, the Hope of our lives, in a manger deep in the heart of Bethlehem. It was only then that I really understood that Jesus came to the world to deliver us from the eternity of death and for us to hope and believe that there is always a brighter tomorrow as there is life after death.

But then one night, it was so cloudy and I failed to see any star when I looked up. I thought I lost my only guide, that there may be no hope after all. I lost heart in searching until I learned to look not at the clouds but beyond it. So I looked and there I found my star still smiling and blinking at me. I then knew that my star was like Jesus for He will always be there for me even when I can't seem to see, feel or notice him beside me. He is my friend, the perfect friend. He will never make me stumble. He will always break my fall.

But then again, Jesus and my star has one difference for even when my star will stop its giving of light, He will never fail to give me light. The only thing I have to do is to make Him the First and Only Star of my Life. //KS96


------
~A~
For my eternal muse... We are of one heart... Forever




Comments

The following comments are for "First Star"
by maimai

Maimai
This is so much like therapeutic writing, I do the same when stress is already eating my whole being. Here, cliches are pardonable and even 'half-hearted hopes' (I don't know how else to call this phrase) like tomorrow is going to be better although you know you are in deep sh** and rescue can only come next week, are meaningful. I allow myself this privilege at times because it helps. But then again the child in me still always believe in first stars even though the adult seem to always quell the genuine hopes that are forming in my heart. I believe in this.

( Posted by: PETERPAULINO [Member] On: September 30, 2004 )

When I was down
Yes, I wrote this when I was pretty down (that was years ago). I don't consider it one of my best writes but I has a little place in my heart. So I decided to share it :)

( Posted by: maimai [Member] On: October 1, 2004 )

MaiMai
Yes, thanks for writing and sharing. Please keep on doing that. :)

( Posted by: peterpaulino [Member] On: October 1, 2004 )





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