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Kate, you know I read your letter and had to walk away from it to keep from ripping it to shreds. I wanted you to get mad but I didnít think you had all that pent up anger inside you. I donít know what to say to you anymore Kate.

You know Iíve tried working on this marriage with you, that I want it to work. Weíve done so many things trying to find and repair everything weíve lost and I just donít know what to do anymore. These letters arenít helping. They are just hard proof that its all falling apart, that nothing we do is ever going to be enough to fix this.

You blame me for everything and I donít know how that happened or how to fix it. Iíve done all I know to do to make this better and I never asked you to quit your job, but whatís wrong with cutting back some? You walk around stressed out 24/7. I think thatís why our sex life is almost nonexistent. Iíve always thought you were beautiful no matter what size you wore.

Shallow has never been a trait of mine and Iím sorry youíre not comfortable around me as you use to be. Yes you used to be a Ďdonít rock the boatí kind of girl but you lost that after the kids were born. Everything had to be your way or to hell with it all. I guess I wanted you to fight for us like you fought for so many other trivial things. You a Ďrightí fighter now. You only care about proving your point and making sure you come out right and on top.

There are so many other things that I use to love about you Kate that you donít have anymore for what reasons I donít know. You were always in the details, you know? Making sure you never packed a school lunch or my briefcase without a note in it from you. And those scrapbooks you would pour over at night wanting them to be just perfect for when the kids got older? Now youíre lucky you sit still long enough to glue the pictures in, let alone add anything extra. Parker use to hate it, but you used to always line the chest of drawers with dryer sheets so our clothes would smell good. There was always a pot of coffee on in the mornings, snacks in the drawer beside the fridge, and some kind of homemade pie or cake in the bakery tin for us to munch on late at night after the kids were in bed. How long has it been since weíve shared a slice of chocolate cake? All these things added up for me and Iím not going to pretend I donít miss them or want them back.

I guess I want the best of both worlds. As for earning points with the licorice drops I didnít realize that was what we had come to. I was just being honest. I worried about you not just myself and the kids. I miss the old Ďusí. Elliot



That sure is some crappy wife you describe, huh....I even loved myself in the description.

You know, Elliot, you may be right. These letters may not be helping, but we are going to complete this if we never complete another thing together because now that you forced me to give myself permission to get angry, Iím SO going to be about the details.

I donít know what house you have been living in. My way? Is that really your perception? I am flabbergasted! But there is no point debating it. Although, I will say that the diminishing of thoughtful and considerate things on BOTH our parts, has been like a self-fulfilling prophecy. As your attention lessened, so did my efforts to bring a smile to your face, and as my efforts lessened, yours continued. It has been a vicious circle that we have brought on ourselves.

I am going to tell you what I want, and what I am willing to do. You will have to decide if you can go there, and if you canít, then we will part as we have been together. With cordiality, giving priority to our children.

I want the husband I married back. I want the little attentive things from you that made me feel special. I want the licorice drops to be for me. I want the fighting to stop. I want our children to be happy in their home and not dread being here for fear of our fighting. I want to have copious and abandoned sex again. I want us to be planning a future and enjoying a past without the mud of life or misperception that has clouded that.

I will not quit my job, because I canít. I am still unsure of our future together. But I will take the vacation I was saving until Christmas now. I will also make arrangements to have a couple of days a week that I donít have to deal with work, and instead can concentrate on you. The children have never suffered from lack of my time, only from our fights. By doing that, I hope that I will find in my heart the impetus to do those things I used to do that you call attending to the details.

I want you to also make the time so that we can do things together, even if it is just going to buy a new pet, or being with the children. I will accept, at face value, your statement that you find me attractive no matter what, and I want your support in a program that helps me find my old self again.

I want your mother to get off my back about how I am neglecting you, warping the children, and donít make our ďhomeĒ what it should be. I want to feel loved again. I want YOU to feel loved again.

If you want to try I am willing. If you arenít willing, then by god, tell me now, because life is short, and timeís aíwastin. I have never hungered for life before these last couple of years. I tried to fill that hunger with work, but it was a pitiful excuse. I want to fill it with my family and our experiences together. If you donít, then at least have the courtesy to tell me. Has this exercise been in vain? Maybe. But at least I will be able to sleep at night knowing that I walked the extra mile and didnít just give up. I feel that you have given up.

Let me know, Elliot. Our future hangs in the balance. And being the analyst that I am, I wouldnít recommend us as a buy. But Iím willing to invest myself.

I loved you before, and want it back.


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The following comments are for "The Letters, Thursday"
by KateandElliot

Too Bad...
Elliot is still and idiot... he seems to be giving up and expecting Katie to do all the changing... His only redeeming factor is that he could give in and maybe do something if Katie is willing to do the doing... Sad... He still needs some awakening...

Katie, again, seems to be willing to try to make things better... Why is it always the woman's place to make things better? I could almost feel sorry for and accept Elliot's behavior if he had tried to change things or in some way help matters and ask for her help in making changes at home... But the twit seems to think if Katie REALLY wanted this to work she will do anything to make it happen...

I would think this will make them both try to work it out... Then, some time down the road they will still split... Sorry to say, it looks inevitable... For the sake of the children, perhaps they can make it happen, at least until the children are gone... Who knows, they may even truly want to stay together at that point... Some do... And some don't... Some wish for change, others do not want it...

In the end, neither is right and either is wrong... It just is what it is, and only each one can truly decide if it is right for them...

For the sake of the children, make it work, till they are gone...

Elliot, swallow that pride, if only a little... Katie, you are not all wrong in your desires...

( Posted by: daprdan [Member] On: August 29, 2004 )

This is better than General Hospital (not that I've watched about a year, lol)!

Why don't people realise that anger is a perfectly valid sign of love and care? it's important that you care enough about a person that you WILL get upset with them. This new entry is beautiful--their humanity comes out, the more upset, the more angry, the more petty they become. I love that...It's a very human piece.

I wonder what will happen next?

I would say more about the characters, but...well, Dan said it well enough :)

Smiling while I nurse an injured hand,

( Posted by: the Co.konspirator [Member] On: August 30, 2004 )

Letters Thursday
I agree with William. They are finally fleshing out. I enjoyed this set very much. Nice work gals...

( Posted by: arc [Member] On: August 30, 2004 )

Great job! I always enjoy logging on and finding the new letters. Keep 'em coming!!

( Posted by: Everybodyelsesgirl [Member] On: August 31, 2004 )

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