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(Announcer:) Mamas and niggas, ya host für da evening, MC Shapeshifter


Yeah, I'm the shape shifter
The lyrical shoplifter
The high plains drifter
So let me get adrift here

Yeah, Im a transformer
A metaphoric swarmer
Poetical performer
Master brain stormer

A prophet not a liar
I'm totally on fire
I said I'd take you higher
I'm a doer, not a tryer

Yeah, I'm the tale teller
No takers, I'm a seller
Got wit like Joseph Heller
I'm Cool like Peter Weller

Yeah, I'm the cracked actor,
The essence, not a factor
the lingual compactor
I hit you like a tractor

Yeah, I'm the righteous ranter
the textual black panter
the doomsday chanter
the verbal enchanter

So get up little wankers.....

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The following comments are for "Shapeshifter"
by shapeshifter

As a freestyle piece this sounded really South London. Freestyle normally has a message, people like Tupac wrote amazing freestyle pieces that once you actually listened to them made you think.

There were alot of chliche rhymes, and some forced ones that didn't link very well.

Try and have a message, your other piece that I commented on really came across well, it flowed, it was relaxed, this piece felt awkward.

Alex :-)

( Posted by: londongrey [Member] On: August 17, 2004 )

choke! choke!
quit behaving like the Kreutzfeld cattle,
or snakes that rattle,
cause this is a battle

( Posted by: shapeshifter [Member] On: August 17, 2004 )

I agree with London to a certain extent...a "prophet" should have something to say. But if your message is self-promotion(which is fine)you should be a "profit".

( Posted by: arc [Member] On: August 17, 2004 )

Battered battle..
I'd love to battle, but the idea that everyone should battle instead of commenting may not work out anymore.. I think instead this rhytmically good piece means, as arc says "look this way". And that's quite a lot music that's about that. I am me. You listen. Did you forget? My name is.. I AM ME, YOU LISTEN (etc)

( Posted by: DrKilldare [Member] On: August 17, 2004 )

Oh, a battle...
you don't wanna battle with me
in a war of rhyme
you are positivLY
you won't walk away unharmed
arc's message is liminal
I'm like a criminal
on the screen
leave you feelin' fresh n' clean
like Zest
I'm the best
at payin' respect
to the one's who came before
I won't be ignored
you'll hit the floor
Listen up Shifta
High plains "grifter"
I'm smooth like oak-aged in a brandy snifter
I'm the shit
like Joyce DeWitt
warm like Suzanne Sommers
not a new-comer
I fly like an eagle
don't need no Regal Beagle
to socialize
cut you down to size
now stop the yellin'
my ears are swellin'
need a Jolly Rancher...watermelon
your standin in quicksand
you can't catch me I'm the gingerbread man

( Posted by: arc [Member] On: August 18, 2004 )

Is it hard to grasp?
a swinging poets' task?
claire I will be there
to show you I can snare
don't need your freshbaked tart
to know that this is art
arc your words they shine
so good they could be mine
shifters' rhyming like a nut
I say your lyrics should be cut
anyone who cross my way
will eat his words some sunny day
hope you'll see the poets' task
is to advance from where you start

( Posted by: DrKilldare [Member] On: August 18, 2004 )

I see you wanna offer me some competition
Well, I'm european and my base is tradition,
centuries of culture and artistic intuition,
got lots of ambition, love and great visions
I'm so high that you can't even rate me
and yankee chicks don't intimidate me
pretend to hate me, but they're dying to date me
arc says she's liminal
to me it's too minimal
next to invisable.
sad and dismissable
talk about profit
you know where to stuff it
you've never been down, and you've never seen the tough shit
I laugh and flash my behind at your kind
with a complexion like mine, it'll make you go blind
Got lips like Jagger and swagger like Elvis
I'm so damn hip I can't see over my pelvis
so stop your whining
you're hardly even rhyming
terrible timing,
you best be resigning
and go back to mining

( Posted by: shapeshifter [Member] On: August 19, 2004 )

keep'em comin...
Eurotrash, yo
ain't got no flash, yo
hopin'rhymes ain't yo bank
cuz you short on cash, yo
it's all good
I like babysittin'
throwing it at me
all that "base tradition"
I can take what you dishin'
your assumption's absurd
hate's a big word
i am a 2 carat
your a CZ
I'm Kid Rock
and you're Joe C
big spender
not The Pretender
until I hit the screen
you coulda been a contender
your simple rhymin'
got nuthin' to say
bad timing,huh?
walk this way...

( Posted by: arc [Member] On: August 20, 2004 )

the shape of the arc is cool
you two are great. What a spontaneity!Maybe you should cooperate and write something.

( Posted by: teflon [Member] On: August 20, 2004 )

Docs last battlewords
Shifters' back with a lack
of putting words on the track
If you're representing Europe,
I'd rather pack my bags up
and move to Cayman Islands
where the taxpayers are smiling
I used to like the rhymes of Arc,
I see now just a Jean in dark
Your inspiration's shallow
It's just a cent per gallon
This battle should be parted
Tina, you're warm-hearted
Why don't we pull our words up
and find a proper poets' cup?

( Posted by: DrKilldare [Member] On: August 20, 2004 )

Doc, please don't go
you stayin' in makes it flow
This is just for fun
no real war to be won
Tina, I'm happy to see you again
always like to hear
how you weigh-in
tryin' something different
just for the heck of it
gettin' outside my zone
makin' a wreck of it
just tryin' to play
not make ya'll mad
I'm done now cuz
i feel sad

( Posted by: arc [Member] On: August 20, 2004 )

i say, i say
Bambee wants to go,
well nobody will be missin you
run for your rep
before we come and piss on you
you say you're resigning
great, we hate your whining
try to suck up to arc,
i shit where're you're dining
You say you wanna run off ht the Isles of Cayman
You'd feel more at home in the bay of pigs, man
Compared to you even arc is a shark
Peein in your bed, and afraid of the dark
Try to take me on, but you suck up to the chicks
my people got a word for you, and it's prick

( Posted by: shapeshifter [Member] On: August 20, 2004 )

I think I will be still
if not you would be ill
your body would be shaking
if I would be taking
the silk gloves of my hands
that's demanded by the stands
you say that others suck
while you're acting like a duck
if you accomplish something real
I guess it'll be the deal
But now you're in your room
too busy with your loom
Ask yourself this question
is this the road to perfecttion?

( Posted by: DrKilldare [Member] On: August 20, 2004 )

Pillow fight
I'd mind my own bussiness
But this is ridiculas
You dead heads can't rhyme
You can't even keep time
The battle you fightin
Should be like greased lightnin
It's more like your pipin
My moma's soft icin
Go back to your prose
Where God only knows
We pet you and praise you
Maybe that'll raise you
But don't think you pussy's
Can tackle the best
All go back to bed
You'll be needin your rest

( Posted by: ivordavies [Member] On: August 21, 2004 )

It's on now..
Time to step the game up round here.. Hahaha..


This is how to write a battle rhyme, none of that pussy shit you guys saying,
I'll rip all the commenters so far, so hey, might as well start the slaying...
One time, coming through, you know I'm brusing fakes,
And fuck a shapeshifter, cause it's more like I am "shifting shape",
I'm so great, ain't none of you whack cats gonna be taking shit,
It's like I'm changing the story of Noah cause this "arc" ain't making it,
Never play with it, hey look now, Devious is flying,
And I saw your battle verse amy, after that never consider rhyming,
I'm shining, smacking bitches so hard I'll damage a bitch,
All of your text delivery's are dead like filing paper-work for tragic miscarriages,
I'll hit amateurs, and serve all you fools like I'm a waiter,
Then throw you through the window of oppurtunity and forget to catch you later,
Don't be a hater, in fact, you're all just jokers,
And if RJ's the "weakest link" then I'm a "chain" smoker,
I won't quote you, but I'm straight up bending G's,
So I'm asking you why you won't reveal to my father, your damn identity,
You must be embarrased, you freaking maggot, dare to be dead,
You're just like cock-sucking in aeroplanes, nothing but an airhead,
I'll care less, about your whack rhymes, you're all so floppy,
I'm like an automatic door, cause none of you can knock me,
Damn sloppy, don't sleep on me, cause I'll punch lines through your eyelids,
All of your battle verses are so cheap it's leaving blind children crying,
You're dying, stepping to Devious I'll make you hurt worse,
If you want my advice about being "intense" go to the circus!
I'll curse herbs, and everyone knows that I can rip a whore,
After this verse you're all left "washed-up" like jelly-fish on seashores,
I'll speak forth, then move on and leave blood spilling from fools,
I should change my name to suspense, cause I'm living proof "suspense is killing you"
You can compare yourself to Devious, but you freaking idiots that's no flattery,
So I'll leave you going out dead on these last couple bars like my cellphone's running outta battery,
It's like that, I'm finished, done, finito, killed you creeps,
You should all consider changing your name to revenge....... Cause revenge is sweet.


That's w-rap, folks..

( Posted by: Devious [Member] On: August 21, 2004 )

By the way, no offense meant to nobody.. Heh

( Posted by: Devious [Member] On: August 21, 2004 )

What a Day
Now what a day this one has been
I entered battle to be seen
But then I met the cruelest joke
A fellow lit'r rose and spoke
He used the comments on my rhyme
To tell the world, that I was fine
His words tell me he knows me well
My reputation he could fell
Just when I thought it can't get worse
My son smelt battle, joined this verse
He's know round here as King of Rap
Though you may think his words are crap
His heart, believe me is like gold
He'll be like me when he grows old
Shapeshifter, I will take my leave
I feel soft feathers gathering speed
If battle flares and gets much warmer
I'll ask Gran Bea to fight my corner
Then all of you should quit, no doubt
For she's the Queen, there is no doubt.

( Posted by: Ivordavies [Member] On: August 21, 2004 )

Devious vs "?"
Ah suprise suprise, the mystery woman speaks but nobody's knowing her,
You spend too much time on the web like flies, so I'll give you a taste of arachnophobia,
You're hoping a, chance of winning comes your way bitch,
So tell me, why hide on the net under a god-damn alias?
I'll maim this kid, RJ you make me laugh so why wait,
Every poster here on litorg can see that battling me is pointless, like the number eight,
I'll stun your face, nobody ever tell you, that you suck?
You see, you ain't enlightening, until somebody lights you up,
You're time is up, in fact you suck, so I'll leave by flying by,
It's as if you're getting stoned in the desert, the way I'm leaving you high and dry,
You're a small fry, of course guy, you wish you didn't ask,
Cause Devious is known to leave you shitting your pants,
Like you're squeezing a pair of jeans out the end of your ass,
Amateurs I blast, you make me laugh, I spit tighter bars than in a prison,
So I'll show you the ropes of this battle shit, and then hang you with 'em... ;)

By the way, who are you?

(Again, no offense intended.. Especially as you're probably a family member)

( Posted by: Devious [Member] On: August 21, 2004 )

Gram to the rescue!
Come on you guys
This should suffice
Cause what I'm hear'in
Isn't nice
What started out
As Poetry
Sure sounds to me
Like bigotry
Words are precious
Please don't use
To try to shock
And light a fuse
Now poor old Ivor
Just wants to rhyme
He never thought
It would be a crime
Now his shadow
Keeps dogging him
Using another pseudonym
So come on out
And reveal yourself
So this mystery
Will resolve itself
If you don't
Gram will deal with you
We'll see you in court
Cause we're gonna Sue!

( Posted by: Beatrice Boyle [Member] On: August 21, 2004 )

love is a battlefield
Man, I turn my back for one minute
the literati come out
tryin' to get in it

IvorD, handin' it to ya Pops
rhymes so sweet, I'm givin' ya props
and it's "Miss Pussy" to you
scratch you with my claws
make you black and blue

Devious, I'll wash your mouth out with Tide
Queen Bea is listenin'
let your conscience be your guide

Gran Bea you're like an apple pie
warm and sweet to the core
no mystery to resolve
go back and read some more

DrKilldare, "acting like a duck"?
Is that all you got?
If so, that sucks
I thought Dr's had "patience"
not this one
runnin' into the woods
like deer from a gun

As for you Sir Shifter
come out and play
stop hidin', start seekin'
this is not your day
underneath your blanky
Arc's big, scared, baby
needs a spanky wanky

Let me get some tissues
for all of ya'll
cryin' for mercy
you've hit the wall

( Posted by: arc [Member] On: August 21, 2004 )

you all
i sit back watchin', far too long
it's about time all you posers shoved along
today's the day you sang your swan song
you all fay wray, i'm king kong

all your words fillin' space, no funk
any past glory you knew locked in the trunk
sloppy fingers typin' shit like your drunk
now that Galv is here you all is punk'd

you never seen me before, hammer of the gods
all the girlie's in my room givin' me nods
big, tall and mean, upon you i'll trod
body snatcher's you all, in your pods

a new king's in town, movin' in to versailles
all in favor in the room say 'aye'
after this you all slumped over with a sigh
fear me not though, for there's more than meets the eye

( Posted by: Galvatron [Member] On: August 22, 2004 )

Battle/ Galvatron
My rhymes are phat
Nope...phatter than that
picture Wynona Judd in her cowboy hat
My rhymes are creamy
Nope...sweeter than cream
flowin' like Willie Wonka's chocolate stream
My thoughts are fresh
Nope...fresher than fresh
crowd follows me like David Koresh
Hey King Galvatron, I say "Aye"
"aye" think you better duck when my words fly
got no game
King Kong you better shudder at my name

( Posted by: arc [Member] On: August 22, 2004 )

Gran into Battle
A brand new day, and what a mess
My champions left you in distress
Compared to her your custard cream
Not choclate from Wonka's machine
And now 'Miss Pussy' your quite tame
Your try at rhyming is quite lame
There's more to this than meets the eye
Go suck a piece of my Grans pie
Its, sharp and crisp, just like her wit
But your just dribble, just like spit.
Now where is shifter, who's place we fight
He made the challenge,am I right?
Alas I think he's gone to ground
Don't think he'd last another round.
His e-mail box must be quite full
For everytime a stroke we pull
A message flies to let him know
So come on back, if you dare show
A Gran, my son, and little me
Is all you have to fear you see
Pussy Galore and hangers on
Will soon give up and all be gone
My champion will see me through
Her pen is gold, and aimed at you
When Johny won his fiddle of gold
Bea's story it was left untold
The Devil then he shit his pants
When trying to match my granny's rants
So stand your ground or go to hell
And join the devil, where he fell!

( Posted by: ivordavies [Member] On: August 22, 2004 )

Oh, it's on...Battle
This game bringin' Claire darksidin'
not a trash talker but she's wave ridin'
Ivor need a bib?
Cuz you droolin'in your crib
lucky Gran has your back
cuz alone your just a hack
competition completed
I can't be defeated
I'm sailing away
in my Corvette Stingray
leave you broken and bruisin'
P.T. Cruisin'
you're Coors Light
I'm Guinness Stout
This lesson is done
school is out.........

( Posted by: arc [Member] On: August 22, 2004 )

Jigs It...
The Fuzz...

( Posted by: daprdan [Member] On: August 22, 2004 )

You wanna call 'em chokers,
You should've put this in 'The Thread'
It's not their fault you misread
Now it's battle, bring out the super-soakers

Don't mess, Tex Claire,
Cuz ya know I don't fight fair
Killin' Darin' Doc,
He Ain't no one ta talk
Tina Louise, Ivor Davies
They're walking, I'm ridin' Mercedes
Sista Arc,
Just straight got no spark
Tranformin' Galvatron,
Zip the lip, I ain't havin' none
Grandma Bea,
Knock ya down, straight 1,2,3
Non-stickin' Teflon
Where's yo rhyme? Call yo mom
And tell Londongrey
He best step out the way
Am I feeling Devious?
No, I'm feeling mischievous
Cuz there ain't no Fairplay,
And the rest just got nothin' ta say

( Posted by: eleutheromaniac [Member] On: August 22, 2004 )

preppie suet MC
don't hassle me

I got central LDN
in my blood stream
you got barbie n Ken
style, boy you dream
natures physical
but here it's,
so I take a stem
from nature's hem
and get lyrically
physical with the
hyper metaphysical
go back to school,
I aint got time
to play with rhyme
I got messages to play
it's you,
that's got nothin to say

( Posted by: londongrey [Member] On: August 22, 2004 )

She think she big
like big ol TX
smile like a fig
sweet to perplex
your tryin to hard
girl lay on ya back
your rhymes a shard
compare with tha nex'
the whole damn crystal
back in your face
fallin from grace
give her some space
cos that is the place
where she lands'n'
your right
this is time
I need to rhyme
cos I'm seeing fuzz
ya'll are gentle
compare with this buzz


( Posted by: londongrey [Member] On: August 22, 2004 )

now see
don' get me on the hateration tip
I'm spittin fire like I was ask'
and now I'm on a trip
rap banter from across the AL
therapy for hazy days
and tongue whippin
what the hell!!?!?

( Posted by: londongrey [Member] On: August 22, 2004 )

Are you on CRACK
White folks rappin
Now THAT is knee slappin'
Never seen a ghetto
serving portabello.
Only "yo" shoes have stilettos.

Sit-in at your dell
pretendin life is hell
words are your big stick.

Have you seen someone on crack
carryin their life in a sack

Shes a brick----house
That lady stack thats a fack
aint holdin nothin back...

sorry, I am on high on crack
I will be right back

( Posted by: harpersfairy [Member] On: August 22, 2004 )

isay i say
well I'm still around and my shape is still shifting
pen like a sword, but my rhuthms is uplifting
I'm doin great with my mike and my 808
And I see life as a duty to celebrate
I'm setting the parameters
for all you amateurs
Hell I'm no stranger
Shapeshifter, the changer
I'm the rhyme ranger
puttin you in danger
hey there galvatron
this ain't no BS marathon
gonna leave you senseless cause you're all defenseless
I'm like a jugller with verbs, nouns and tenses
you better seek shelter 'fore the bombing commenses
I'm down on the scene with beats as hard as iron
Got more rhymes than my man Lord Byron
And now for arc
she wants to be the shark
but she's lacking the spark
go play in the park
Harpers fairy?
way too hairy
You're a bigger asshole than Denis Learylegal action threats from Beatrice Boyle
well, that's more uptight than a magnets coil
Yeah, I'm still the shifter and I'm still the winner
Claire, If you're choking still, you owe me a dinner
you know I'm a sinner
and that's an off-spinner

( Posted by: shapeshifter [Member] On: August 23, 2004 )

Battle of the lame
Shapeshifter your back
Was that meant to be rap
Me I just rhyme
And try keeping time
You think your words pretty
We think they are shitty
Is english a language that you ever use
Or is it your aim the words to abuse
'like a jugller with verbs, nouns and tenses'
Can't even spell 'juggler', you have no defences
Go back to your cafe and take a stiff drink
Dont 'play' with you betters, your words tend to stink.
I'm finished now, I'll leave it with Bea
Even our granny can finish of thee!

( Posted by: ivordavies [Member] On: August 23, 2004 )

Endless viewcounts
Viewcounts on the rise
Won't even pay the prize
For quality on retreat
The amateurs all meet
I say like Cartman, pure and wise
Oh my god I hate you guys
But worst of all is shifters cheat
Can't tell it from a monkey's treat

( Posted by: DrKilldare [Member] On: August 23, 2004 )

shapeshifters phoney
"probly" has a pony
his brothers mama gottem
when he hit the bottom.

needs a book of diction

User, schmoozer
mostly a lonley LOSER

( Posted by: harpersfairy [Member] On: August 24, 2004 )

so now you qote me, Ivor Davies
well you're the kind they sing about in "in the navy"
English, I seem to know it better than you do
Cause my words keep flowing like tahitian voodoo
You look like a psycho
pointing out my typos
Copyingt my rhymes
but you can't keep the time
try to dis' my words
well yours smell like turds
I'm flowing like the nile
And you, you lack the style
You're mentally a child
And I'm just too wild

( Posted by: shapeshifter [Member] On: August 25, 2004 )

Beating the Retreat
I think my champion will agree
That in our rhyme we've slaughtered thee
But while I like to write in prose
And to the 'pillow fight ' I rose
The language used is not for 'we'
Althougth I certainly agree
It's place, in truth for those that share
The rhyme and wit to keep it there
Is in rap battles, fought with skill
To make opponents feel quite ill
For me my friend, it was quite fun
But now at last I've run and done
You know I did not mean a word
To think I did would be absurd
I'm bowing out, you've won the game
Before my poetry turns to shame
I'd rather stick to good advice
Than turn 'my' talents into vice
I'm only joking, that you know
And wish you well...but now must go.


( Posted by: ivordavies [Member] On: August 25, 2004 )

Less arty, ifst thou please
While i'm tryin'ta put some rhythm to me rhymes here
Others insist on impersonating Shakespeare
Now I'm taking heat for not having manners
Just because my language don't match what's on banners
I like my martinis stirred and not shaken
Speaking of offense, y'all know there's none taken
Told you before, I'm not from your continent
Maybe Im posessed the eurotrash sentiment
If it makes you feel good, see me as a gringo
And turn your nose up to the smell of my lingo
But I'm still lurching like a lyrical dingo
Cause battling's to me what the drums were to Ringo

( Posted by: shapeshifter [Member] On: August 26, 2004 )

Defence & Respect
Oh, yeah, - gonna take out tha thrash, y'all
And there - I'm gonna put y'all 'gainst the wall
Cause now - it's time for those who are plain and small
To - get - to know the shit from the cinn'monroll

He's here - the Shifter's here in tha house tonight:
Lit. Org: - he's layin rhymes and knows how yo fight
Oh, yeah - all of you unrhythmic guys and chicks
You'll have - to bow your heads and stop turning tricks

And, so - while we have Shapeshifter in the house
We pay - him our respects as do cheese the mouse
And so, when Shifter has got adrift, now
We all - can share in voicin' a common "wow!"

( Posted by: Lennart [Member] On: August 31, 2004 )

Have we all forgotten the taste
seems ya'll
now lost in space

( Posted by: londongrey [Member] On: September 20, 2004 )

Shape's busted rimes
Damn, I wouldn't have expected this from ya, Shape! You one ill sumnabitch!

( Posted by: Viper9 [Member] On: September 20, 2004 )

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