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Yeah, I went and saw Blade 2. My excuse? Ron Perlman (The City of Lost Children) is in it. I like Ron Perlman. So I saw Blade 2.

Folks, this is not nearly so bad a movie as it could have been. Knowing sequels, and the penchant Hollywood has for consigning them into oblivion, this is not a bad movie at all. The schtick goes like this:

Blade is still around, mooshing vampires left and right. One day he is approached by these two vampires who want to offer him a truce. The ruling body of the vampire nation has a bigger problem than Blade on their hands. Seeing as how these days Blade can kill vampires as easily as you or I might bite off the head of a marshmallow peep, it must be a big problem indeed. It is. There's a new strain of vampire out there, called a Reaper. They're led by Reaper badass Nomak, who's making more of them at an exponential rate. So Blade teams up (sort of) with a group of vampires called The Bloodpack, led by our man Ron Perlman. The Bloodpack is interesting, they've each got their little gimmick. Discerning moviegoers will note the prescence of Honk Kong Action Movie legend Donnie Yen among their number. They kick copious amounts of ass. So Blade and Co. head out to destroy the Reapers. They kill them all, dump Nomak down the incinerator, and kick back with blood & tonics for the rest of the movie.

Okay, maybe not. But it would've been interesting.

I came away from this movie with the impression that it had been done by two completely different people. First you have Script Man. Script Man likes Blade. He's also a pretty good writer, all things considered. Script Man writes an exciting, fast-paced thriller with lots of character development and plenty of snappy one-liners. He comes away with a very good movie (for an action movie) and gives it to the moviemakers. Then they call in Action Guy. Action Guy likes action. A lot of it. He also likes pro wrestling. He has a vague idea who Blade is. Action Guy takes the script, scribbles over the really long paragraphs, and says 'Okay, dude. Here's where we're putting the Really Cool Ninjasword Battle, and over here, where all this exposition is, we'll put the 'Really Really Cool Pool of Blood Battle. Oh yeah, and over here, where this good ending is...' Yeah. Action Guy.

So what do we end up with? On the one hand, you've got an action movie with a decent storyline, gripping characters, and a few nice plot twists. Then you have the battles. The battles are long, and they've got CGI. Gobs of it. There are times where Blade is rendered entirely in CGI, and it shows. This is bad, and believe me, if you don't laugh at least once during the final battle, I will be very surprised.

When all the little vampire flakes have been swept up, Blade II gets 6 out of 10 stars. Somebody smack Action Guy.

Scene to Watch For: The Ron Perlman scene. Any of them.

Most Memorable Line: "Some of us can't see in the dark! What am I supposed to do, ya f*ckin' nipplehead?"

Things that make you go 'Huh?': The final battle. The big motherraping pool of blood. The point of Whistler's continued existence.

------
"Quit this world, quit the next world, quit quitting!" -Sufi proverb.


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Comments

The following comments are for "Blade 2 - A review."
by Beckett Grey

Blade 2
I agree with most of that, adding to it I think Blade wasn't a very good character considering how good most of the other characters in it were.

But I disagree about most memorable line, the one that still stands out in my mind is "If you want something done right, you have to do it your self. That is what my daddy said right before he killed my mom."

I ended up liking the CGI, it wasn't great, but it was interesting. However I do hope to see a lot less of it in Blade3.

( Posted by: Ragath [Member] On: March 25, 2002 )

Agree
Beckett,
With this review you definately hit the nail right on the head. For being a sequal (especially to Blade) the story was good. Now, I personally love action in movies and when I watch the Blade movies all that I can think is that I want his toys - gotta love the weapons. As for action man he does should be punished - I take martial arts and went to see the movie with my instructor, when all the CGI stuff was shown he got this pained expression on his face. It was that bad too much CGI not enough real stuff (for all of you who have not seen it yet). Although one actor that did very cool action stuff without CGI was Donnie Yen (Snowman) it was very good.
Later,
Dras
p.s. I am searching for action man - maybe I will get to smack him:).

( Posted by: Drastine [Member] On: March 26, 2002 )

re: Ron Perlman
Yes, he was, and the TV series was actually called 'Beauty and the Beast' if I remember correctly.

Ron Perlman was also in Alien: Resurrection, and had a small part in Sleepwalkers as an unfortunate police officer.

( Posted by: Beckett Grey [Member] On: March 26, 2002 )

Blonde
I'm just curious if Jessica was referring to the girl who played Nyssa. If so, it is posible that she has changed her name, but imdb.com did not have her listed in any Arnold S movies. She seems to have just started acting in 97. But if i am innaccurate, let me know. I am curious. Do you know which Arnold movie it was?

P.S. I do regret yelling at you. You just really hit a nerve.

( Posted by: E.G. Evans [Member] On: March 26, 2002 )

echoing
I have to echo the statements regarding your movie reviews :) they're awesome and don't give too much away, but enough to give a good indication of good and bad, and from that i always find it an excellent general guide, as to whether its worth my money in the cinema or not. Either that, or if i 've already seen it, then its interesting to see what someone else thought.

Many thanks :) Being that Blade was one of my bf's favourite movies, going to see the second one, even if it was bad, was a foregone conclusion - btw, i know he appreciated the review as well, after i showed it to him.

Completely off the topic of Blade II, but any thoughts on Ice Age?

Ju =*_*=

( Posted by: De`esse [Member] On: March 27, 2002 )

re: echoing
Many thanks for your kind words De'esse!

Unfortunately, I have yet to see Ice Age, and so cannot comment on it. That's the trouble with us college students- we can afford about one movie per week, if we're lucky, and reviewing movies that have been out on video for some time is bad form, in most situations.

Anyway, thanks to all of you for reading, and I will be certain to continue reviewing new movies whenever possible.

( Posted by: Beckett Grey [Member] On: March 27, 2002 )

Linda
Yeah, i was informed that i misunderstood. I thought you were saying that Linda Hamilton played Nyssa in Blade 2. I see the error of my ways. But yeah, she was in the Terminator movies. She been in quite a few things since then, but nothing of significance.

( Posted by: E.G. Evans [Member] On: March 27, 2002 )





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