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10Beatrice Boyle
10Dareva
10JEANNIE45
10SoulShade

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_Dusk_

And thus does the sun close the day in triumph:
One last blast of colour to satiate the soul.

Chimney stacks and ariels silouhetted, shadowed;
Dark enough for the dimness behind to glow.

And what etheral wonders! Fire in the sunset clouds,
A dying storm painted in pastel shades of glory.


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Spudley Strikes Again
www.BadPuns.com
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Comments

The following comments are for "Dusk"
by Spudley

Spud
Thank you for writing this. I have been waiting for you to write something and post it..this is grand.. it is so 'IMPALPABLE'

Thanks for a great read...

Blessings to you always,
{{{Jeannie}}}

( Posted by: JEANNIE45 [Member] On: July 1, 2004 )

Dusk
"One last blast of colour to satiate the soul..." -beautiful!

( Posted by: emaks [Member] On: July 1, 2004 )

Nice
Now that is probably the best way to picture a city sunset that I have ever read. Nicely done.

( Posted by: nauticus66 [Member] On: July 2, 2004 )

Welcome home my son!
Spudley, I thought you had retired and gone out to "Poetry Pasture" when WHAM! you came up with a beauty!

I'm reminded of a line in an old Spencer Tracy/Katherine Hepburn movie...I believe it was Pat & Mike...referring to Kate's figure.

"She hasn't got much on her...but what she has is "cherce! (choice!)

This one was "cherce" my friend.

( Posted by: Beatrice Boyle [Member] On: July 2, 2004 )

thank you.
A quick thank-you to all who commented on this one. I'm glad you liked it. :)

I do love sunsets; they can be so dramatic. I have written poems about them here before, but there's always something new to be said.

( Posted by: Spudley [Member] On: July 3, 2004 )

dusk
Wow, here's a great example of less being more. You've packed a lot into these six lines.

I typically don't care for the word 'thus', but I think it works well here as it suggests a courtly, honorable feeling for the glory of the sunset.

These two lines are brilliant, "Chimney stacks and ariels silouhetted, shadowed;/Dark enough for the dimness behind to glow." I love this visual and the incredible subtlety of it.

The only critique I'd have is that the mention of the word 'pastel' in the last line seems to contradict how dim and dark this sunset is expressed to be in the rest of the poem.

Good write,

( Posted by: inkton [Member] On: July 6, 2004 )

Spudley,
This is the morning I write in, where dark slowly turns light. Such great imagery, and great writing. Thank you for sharing this with us all!!~D

( Posted by: Dareva [Member] On: July 18, 2004 )





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