Squawking Too Much
by Jessicanm (Member) - published: June 29, 2004
Word Count: 201 Word Bytes: 1264 Viewed: 652 times
Category - Poetry
© Copyright by Jessicanm

7.83

(6 votes)

Rating	Rated by

8	chapter1

6	londongrey

10	PETERPAULINO

6	rainierthisyear

7	Teflon

10	windchime

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mean, ugly a snivelling bitch
But at your age you're more a witch
with backhanded remarks for all to see.

Snotty, snide, and immature
What you're out to prove
or change I can't be sure.

Your creed: Come join with me and follow close, or be careful of my wrath,
Even though at times, followers get a bit of both
You've stuck around to my dismay
I'm not the only one that feels, so strongly, this way

You bitch and you moan, you whine and
cry foul play
but all I worry about is seeing you day after day,
up to the same old tricks
getting some sick enjoyment, some teenage kicks
from cutting people down, and acting better than most.

Your words are endless and seem to spew with self-importance
God help those that question
or dare to disagree with
Queen Almighty's suggestions

Its easy for me to decide how far away from you I want to be.
And now others are starting to see
just how fun it is
to have a joyous bitch around
to stir up trouble and cause a fuss
oh but wait, I know what you'll say,
you'll squawk its me that talks too much.

------
Jessica@Lit.Org or Jessicamg@gmail.com

~How vain it is to sit down and write when you have not stood up to live.~

Henry David Thoreau

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Comments

The following comments are for "Squawking Too Much"
by Jessicanm

squawking
I don't know who this is, but "whoever" *needs* to be squawked at. Self-importance is one irksome thing, but that, paired with other-destructiveness, is punishable by, well... squawking, for sure!

( Posted by: windchime [Member] On: June 29, 2004 )

Windchime
Thanks for the comment Chime, I appreicate it. I wrote this little gem a few hours ago in a fit of aggravated anger. Looking at it now it needs some clean up and I don't like the way the stanza three is reading, though I felt it still needs to be said.

I do appreciate it and yes I do agree said person does need to be squawked at and if I get my way she'll be shut down too. ;) Thanks for the feedback.

~Jessica

( Posted by: Jessicanm [Member] On: June 29, 2004 )

hello, i love you.
Careful not to become the very thing you accuse another of.

As a poem, I'm sorry, but it strikes me as a rant with linebreaks. Just doesn't do anything for me, but I'm sure the one you wrote this for is no doubt smiling.

( Posted by: die_daily [Member] On: June 29, 2004 )

slice of adder pie
Jess~

I liked this piece, especially the ease in which it seemed to shyme. Some of the line breaks throw me off, but that may just be my preference for short line breaks showing. The emotions here feel very real and it showcases your wit rather well. I'll be looking forward to more.

Bart

( Posted by: Bartleby [Member] On: June 30, 2004 )

squawking too much
Jessica! Look how anger could inspire you to pen such a funny poem. I believe it's not just sorrow, joy and love we should write about as good poets. Indignation is still part of the drama.

I especially like the first stanza. ;)

( Posted by: peterpaulino [Member] On: June 30, 2004 )

strong
good, tasteful rant,
but the rhyming is erratic,
ruins punch lines that you build up.

( Posted by: Teflon [Member] On: July 6, 2004 )

Is this a theme?
This is the third piece of yours I've read, and the second piece of poetry.
Frankly, I'm noticing a theme of, to be honest, bitchiness.
I hope not all your work is about attacking other women, because it doesn't do much to disguise your fairly standard style.
I hope you've written a lot more prose, because I enjoy it a lot more than your poetry.
Oh, there's a touch of irony in this poem that I'm not sure is deliberate or not. At one point you mention 'teenage kicks from cutting someone down'. I hope that's deliberate, because you seem to be playing the same game.
Unless I've missed the point of this poem, which I might have. I'm not very good at this.

( Posted by: MacLaren [Member] On: August 17, 2004 )

Squawking to Much
Love the sarcasm in this! Got a kick out of Queen Bitchiness. (lol)

Nae

( Posted by: nae411 [Moderator] On: August 17, 2004 )

Again MacLaren
Nah, its not a theme but anger is an emotion that seems to get the writing mojo flowing for a lot of people. This one came off a member at the time that was totally out of control. As for me doing the same thing, you're completly wrong, writing a poem about a person with no name is merely expressing emotion, cutting someone down would be to call them out directly or put a blinking banner above this piece with their name in it....lol.....I guess you did miss the point.

Nae thanks for the comment girl, it was good getting this out on paper and it was good writing something other than feel good things. :)

~Jessica

( Posted by: Jessicanm [Member] On: August 17, 2004 )

interesting poem
I like the quote by Henry David Thoreau.

( Posted by: DieBaronHobskewward [Member] On: September 20, 2004 )

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