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Pocketful Of Undisturbed Words.


Breaking free,
From the stone,
My feet were set in,
Taking me?
Not a chance,
Without a decent reception,
Digesting imperfections,
Understating the brainís erections,
Typically intercepting,
Any known form of acceptance...

Born grown,
From storms,
Well known,
The norm,
Is but an episode,
Of warm or cold river flows,
Vigorous clones,
Are exposed,
For the secrets they hold,
Beneath the briefest of moulds,
Is the discreetness unknown?
Story told,
Things got old,
Withering in to nothing,
Intricately moving on to find the next substance,
Worth loving,
Living for a purpose,
Brings more than less pain,
Itís inevitably immersed,
In to perverse water first,
Contracting a curse,
Moving traverse,
With a pocketful of undisturbed words,
Soon to relay the meaning of perturbed,
Without understanding the reality,
Of life, typical insanity,
Causes strife, as well as vanity,
For the correct to prevail over the angry,
You may understand me, you may not,
Words have many meanings,
Provide true feelings and emotion,
Sealing devotion for healing,
Promoting the appealing,
While ignoring the greatest of beings...

Chris P Davies

------
If a picture's worth a thousand words,
I've pained a thousand pictures,
If a scream is worth a thousand dreams,
I've dreamed a thousand whispers...


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Comments

The following comments are for "Pocketful Of Undisturbed Words."
by Devious

Undisturbed words
Loved the title, loved the poem, then I would, I'm biased.

Can't wait to see what the others think of it.

Ivor

( Posted by: ivordavies [Member] On: June 11, 2004 )

Ivor..Undisturbed Words
Thanks, wasn't sure you would.

Chris

( Posted by: Devious [Member] On: June 12, 2004 )

Saul, Mathers and line breaks
Devious~

I really like the feel of this piece. The spoken word style suits you well leaving me with an impression of both Saul Stacy Williams and Marshall Mathers... The ral Slim Shady can stay in his seat.. It's got a fairly unique voice and I enjoyed it.

But I would revisit your line breaks on this.. I think that by making the individual lines longer and the ryhmes less obvious in the format that the poem would read better, both internally and aloud. But that's just my two yen.

Bart

( Posted by: Bartleby [Member] On: June 12, 2004 )

Thanks...
Thanks for your comments on my work, Bart. Yeah, Saul Williams is quite an influence in this piece for me. I think though my basic and most important influence is Illogic, if you have ever heard of him.. He blends rap verses with spoken word/poetry very well. Something I try to do. Anyway.. Enough talking ;)

Thanks in advance to anyone else who drops some feedback.

- Devious

( Posted by: Devious [Member] On: June 12, 2004 )





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