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Alright, first off is a little prologue of mine. This story is based around 5 elements/wills to fight. Speed, Strength, Life, Chaos, and Hope. Each person, or the 5 main "Good Guys" contains one of these. There are five total good guys, Matthias, Metian, Jade, Jennifer, and Jesse. You will find out eventually where each of them fits in the storyline.
There are two places, or worlds, that this takes place on. First is the world we know, or Earth. Second is Norn. A fantasy world of my creation where the world is about to enter the physical plane of our Earth and destroy them both in the process. There are also 2 bad guys, but we will not get into that yet. Now..on with the story..

---------------Chapter 1----------------
The power of the five Brought together can destroy

Brought together can create

The path is the choice of the "One" It takes 5 to bring it together

But only one to destroy itů

The eyes peer out from within the darkness of the cave. The cave's essence carried that of somewhat unworldly. A face crossed the creature, some would call in a smirk, others pure evil. "It is almost time," he said, "almost time for the awakening." Slowly the creature slipped from the bed of rocks that had served as his place of slumber for thousands of years. This creature, not evil, yet pure evil. It left the cave, looking upon a world so very different from ours, but still so similar at the same time. Wings spreading from its back slowly. One wing of an angel, pure white feathers shimmering in the darkest spot. The other wing of hatred and wickedness, pure black and leather, like a bat. The mood glinting off of every crevice of the feathers as he lifted into the air.

Flying along a field of pure green. Crystal of white, blues, and silvers jetting out of the grass. Going hundreds of feet into the air, touching the clouds bottoms softly. The air was crisp, cool, like most evening were. The stars seemed too close. Each a very bright light in the sky, giving the world the look of almost daytime. But still, day itself would break soon. The creature flew past the field and to the beaches of Norn. Flying along the crystal clear blue waves for miles and miles. Finally settling down a single giant crystal that jetted out of the water. Waves crashing against it and still it stood strong like this since the creature had fallen asleep so many years ago. The creature, perched on the rock, looked out at the calm waves lapping against the bottom of the crystal. "The sea is calm this eve," he said, "too calm." He reached with a hand that was like a human but seemed so fragile that if you touched it, it would shatter into a million pieces.

The hand slowly plucked 5 feathers from its back. Each seemed to shift from either black or white to a different color. Slowly he lifted the first, a feather that was as green as the field had been. "Life" he said as he let it go and drift into the water below. He then took the next, a bright red, seeming to burn like fire. "Strength" said in the same tone as before, letting that one drift into the water as well. The third came, "speed", as did the fourth, which was "chaos". Then he drew the fifth one into his hand and seemed to be memorized in its beauty. It glimmered with gold for one second, then silver, then blue and green, then back to gold again. A soft whisper for the word was all he could muster "hope". He let the final feather drift into the water.

As the final feather hit the water they seemed to form a patter, each letting off an aura of its individual color. Each a different symbol, a different color, a different way of life, a different reason for fighting. All of the feathers being engulfed within their own color, and then, they were gone. The creature looked to the sky, one eyes white, like he was blind. The other pure black, like evil itself. He saw a sun rise, bright and brilliant. Then he saw another sun rise into the sky, a dying star, a dark red and much smaller. "It is indeed time," he said, "the stars of judgement have risen."

Itachi: You lack you know why?
Sasuke: W-why..?
Itachi: Because you lack it....hatred.

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The following comments are for "The Power of the Five: Chapter 1"
by Wicked Voodoo

The Five
A few things about this story. I did think you had some creative ideas. Making the creature somehow half evil and half good was interesting. I do think you should have kept the prologue in a similar fashion as the story. Meaning, if you are going to write the story in a Fantasy genre, then I think it is better to make the prologue have a Fantasy tone as well. Even though it is a prologue, I think you could better use it to start to draw the reader into your world, while still explaining what's going on. Also, I sas one glaring mistake in the writing, when the creature lands on the crystal, you first tell of the waves crashing into the crystal, then go on to explain that the sea was calm. If you mean that the sea had been rough, all these years and is now calm, it just wasn't clear. I think too, you said memorize and you meant mesmorize. Just a few comments to an otherwise good little story. I think you probably would have smoothed these things out anyway, in making it a longer story. Keep writing it though, it's certainly sparked my interest.

( Posted by: Jeff [Member] On: February 26, 2002 )

Funny that in commenting over your using the word memorize over mesmorize I F'd up and wrote sas instead of saw. Sometimes life is so ironic.

( Posted by: Jeff [Member] On: February 26, 2002 )

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