Lit.Org - a community for readers and writers Advanced Search
 




Average Rating
0.00

(0 votes)

You must login to vote

In english class we had assignent after reading some line poems of writing our own. After reading the Poem Fear by Raymond Carver one of our prompts were to make a line poem of what we wish people would say to us. And also our rendition of what we wouldve wrote if we were Raymond Carver.

What I wish People would Say to me
Your Paul,
Your Charming
I donít care what you look like.
Youíre published
I want to read your books.
Hello, Mr. President
I am sorry For all that I have done
Your suffering has helped others
Youíve changed the world
You will be Missed.

Fear of
Fear that its just not the wind
Fear of being tricked
Fear that the night never ends
Fear of hate deep inside
Fear my mother will die
Fear that life is not worth it
Fear that some girl will play with my heart
Fear that the lighting will come to close
Fear that I will go unappreciated
Fear that I will always be alone
Fear that I will turn into my dad



Related Items

Comments

The following comments are for "Line Poems"
by Mr36

Interesting
That was an interesting redition Mr36. At the end of it all it's all good.

Gabriel

( Posted by: Gabriel [Member] On: April 22, 2004 )

Thanks Gabriel
Thanks for your comments they were much appreciated
Mr36 aka Paul

( Posted by: Mr36 [Member] On: April 22, 2004 )

Claire
Hoefully by the time you read this you already read it. lol so I dunno if it scared you its a matter of opionion.

( Posted by: Mr36 [Member] On: April 24, 2004 )

What I wish People would say to me
Hi, Paul!
I read your post at www.lit.org. Your Charming!
I donít care what you look like as long as you're a good person at heart!
You really are published, right here! Right now!
I want to read your books!
"Hello, Mr. President" even it your just the president of "INURROOM."
I don't know what suffering you're been through, but when you share what you've been through with anyone, "Your suffering has helped others!"
Whenever you compliment or castigate someone, "Youíve changed the world!"
Even if no one else knows, God knows, "You will be Missed."
So have a great day! You'll never get it back.

( Posted by: MaxiiJ [Member] On: April 27, 2004 )

Thanks MaxiiJ
Thanks. I know you mean it to. I am glad you responded in kind its orginal and greatly appreciated =). Have a good one.
Mr36 aka Paul

( Posted by: Mr36 [Member] On: April 27, 2004 )





Add Your Comment

You Must be a member to post comments and ratings. If you are NOT already a member, signup now it only takes a few seconds!

All Fields are required

Commenting Guidelines:
  • All comments must be about the writing. Non-related comments will be deleted.
  • Flaming, derogatory or messages attacking other members well be deleted.
  • Adult/Sexual comments or messages will be deleted.
  • All subjects MUST be PG. No cursing in subjects.
  • All comments must follow the sites posting guidelines.
The purpose of commenting on Lit.Org is to help writers improve their writing. Please post constructive feedback to help the author improve their work.


Username:
Password:
Subject:
Comment:





Login:
Password: