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Darkness billows, black cloud falls.
She feels it spread along the walls,
Of her heart which once was warm.
Now it beats in jet black form.
Pain and loss rum rampant 'round,
heart's cold, crumbling, lifeless ground.

-Punx make better lovers-

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The following comments are for "- Complete eclipse of a charcoal heart -"
by blackheartedpunk

Very Nice

I enjoyed this read very much. The words seem to just slide on in home.


( Posted by: JEANNIE45 [Member] On: March 25, 2004 )

The rhyming scheme and the rhyming in plural was awesome, they fit together perfectly...its like you made strawberry rhubard pie of poetry!

( Posted by: EndlessFear [Member] On: March 25, 2004 )

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