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This is somthing I wrote a while ago for my site. Most of my rants are based more or less on things that really happen... More or less 8 )...

Hal


I kind of feel like I missed out on a part of fatherhood. Somehow, I missed getting the standard Fathers Day and Birthday gifts, the dreaded tie. Well they are useful you know. What else are you going to use the few hundred stray hangers that are always in the closet for than to hold all your ties? Well you can use them to hold your car muffler on like I do I suppose. No, not the ties! The wire hangers! Those old hangers make dandy TV antennas too...

I really, really hate hangers actually. If there were only two hangers in the closet, they would be tangled with each other. Not to mention that they would be hung on the closet rod opposite of each other so you can't just grab them both and unhook them at the same time. You know what I'm talking about. I never take a hanger out of the closet to take a shirt off it. I just strip it off like you would peal a banana. Unfortunately, we have the hangers with the damn extra bend in them so your shirts don't slip off. The shirts always get caught on the extra bend and get all stretched out of shape when you try to yank it off.

A few months ago, I was working in an empty store in a shopping plaza, getting it ready for new tenants. I was pounding on a wall, counter sinking nail holes in the drywall so I could putty over them so the wall could be repainted. On the other side of the wall I was pounding on, was a beauty salon. After a bit of pounding, the woman manager came over and stuck her head in the door and asked me if I could pound more quietly as I was disturbing her customers. I asked her if she could speak louder as I was having trouble hearing her because all her big, huge, floor mounted hair dryers were making so much noise. I didn't have any trouble hearing her when she shouted at me the second time. After her color returned to a pleasant pink instead of the bright red of anger, and thinking for a moment, I assured her I could probably convince my hammer to make a bit less noise, and if not, I had a smaller one in the van that I could probably get to cooperate.

Also, a while back I did a little repair work in an indoor Tennis facility. I had to patch around a few windows that had suffered some water damage. It must have been ladies day because that is all that seemed to be playing this morning. I was working away, oblivious to the surroundings (well, almost oblivious) when a group of woman came down the stairs to the tennis courts. One of them, following a bit behind, yelled down from the top of the stairs to the other ladies... "Do you have balls?" The other three women all replied, "Yes, we have balls." I had to go outside for a while and smoke a cigarette to get control of myself. Sheesh! The things us construction workers have to go through to make a living...



Comments

The following comments are for "Pondering real life"
by The Hal

Wire hangers piss me off
Wire hangers piss me off too. I swear they are always falling on the floor then I end up stepping on them and getting them painfully stuck between my toes. Until I really need one, like the time I locked my keys in my truck at the Rio Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas. I went looking for a wire hanger in the hotel and you would think I was looking for the fucking Holy Grail or something. 2,000 some odd fucking rooms and not one wire hanger...go figure.

( Posted by: Jeff [Member] On: January 9, 2002 )

funny stuff
You covered a lot of topics there, but they were all humorous.

It sure is nice to have you around Hal, not just for the great stories, but also because of your comments.

Keep up the good work hal, and I'll keep reading.

Bye,

Parteepants

( Posted by: Richard Dani [Member] On: January 9, 2002 )





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