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There is a darkness, welling up inside me
The shadow falls, hiding the anger in my eyes
The bitter taste of bile as I choke back the hate
A flicker of a smile belies my hearts true beat
The thunder rushes across my face and I wince
Tension quivers along my skin, my fists clench
I want to lash out and destroy those around me
To end their incessant whining and bickering
To leave them cold, limp and bleeding
I can almost touch it, touch that feeling
It slithers across my soul, warm, buzzing
My teeth draw tight, piercing my lip
Warm blood dances on my tongue, in my mind
The pain draws a smile, sickly and cold
I feel the shackles of restraint as they buckle
I'm infused with lust, I can almost touch it
The anger engulfs me, wave upon wave
My skin flashes red, moist with sweat
The chains rattle and I look my demons in the eye
And for the first time, I taste their fear
My rage lashes out burning to a cinder
Ashes all that remain, remnants of my charred soul


------
Chrispian H. Burks
Lit.Org Owner / Founder
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The following comments are for "Anger"
by Chrispian

roar
"When we talk without amend
We see red and then
Deep inside out blood begins to boil
Like a tiger in the cage
We begin to shake with RAAAAAAGE!"
-Judas Priest

I liked it. Very menacing.

( Posted by: evil_bacteria [Member] On: February 27, 2004 )

grrr
Wow, I liked this alot. The beginning was very exciting and really built everything up for me! And the ending didn't disappoint. This is one of the best anger poems I've ever read...

( Posted by: Darkshine Raven [Member] On: February 27, 2004 )

Are we that bad?
"I want to lash out and destroy those around me/ To end their incessant whining and bickering"

Have things really gotten that out of control 'round here, Crowe?
********

I also really enjoyed this poem, though if I may -- I think the repetition of the word anger muffles it's impact.

Also the repetition of smile (which flickers in the second line and then reoccurs as a reaction to pain in the 14th -- do you really smile this much in anger?), and then your chains metaphor, which I think threw me off the most.

In the 15th line you reference "the shackles of restraint" and then in line 19, "The chains rattle and I look my demons in the eye" I wondered -- are the chains which rattle yours, your demons or are they a re-referencing of the shackles of your restraint? I really liked the idea of them belonging to your demons and thus their rattling attracting your attention to their malevolent owners, which is the way I envisioned it through the first reading. Yet this seems to make the shackles metaphor awkward. I'm curious as to what you intended?

Overall, however, it's a very nicely crafted and striking work -- made me wonder why you don't post poetry more often. :)

( Posted by: hazelfaern [Member] On: February 28, 2004 )

Dusty Anger
Chris,

You've not posted poetry since 2004?? Shame on you boss.

Well, I promised to dig around and find some stuff of yours. I've read several pieces but this one really struck me.

I love the irony that tags along with "a flicker of a smile belies my hearts true beat" I can imagine the sarcasam there. The description you've used is very powerful and thought provoking. You've created some startling images here.

I like the use of the word "lust" in corralation with anger. I've always found the two to go hand in hand. I was surprised to see someone else did as well. Most would disagree with me.

The tension you built in this piece comes together well at the end. Your own demons fearing you is an unusual take and I dig that.

All in all a great piece! I really enjoyed it and now must ask the 64,000,000 dollar question...when are we going to see more? I feel deprived having not seen anything since your Ali-like return.

Much Love,

Dave

( Posted by: HeRoCoMpLeX [Member] On: July 11, 2011 )





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