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8.5

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9Ogg
8Penelope

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As I come home after school


Towards home I cross the street
Even before I open the door


I know who’s waiting to greet

I turn the handle quietly


And muffle the keys on my pack
I slowly push the door open


A black nose shoves through the crack

It moves the door the rest of the way


I immediately take sight
Of my gigantic furry welcoming


Committee; Towards me he takes flight

He throws his paws on my shoulders


And tries to lick my face
His tail whaps against the wall


At an increasing pace

He then jumps down onto the ground


And sits obediently
He pants as if there is no end


He acts so leniently

He dashes halfway up the steps


Looks back to see if I follow
I run towards him; He barks with joy


Making the room sound hollow

We reach the room on the second floor


He jumps around some more
I grab his very favorite toy


And we play tug-of-war

After a while, he finally calms


In a way that’s so funny
I throw my arms around his neck


I love my dog, Benny

This poem is very much unlike my other works; Probably because I was required to write a rhyming poem for school. Ah well...it's my first rhyming poem anyway, tell me what you think.


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Comments

The following comments are for "My Dog Benny"
by fantasy_angel613

Good start
This is a fun read; descriptive, colorful, light, and happy. I agree with Penelope in that the last verse needs a little help with its rhyme scheme, but hey, anybody that can make a rhyme work with "obediently" gets my vote!

( Posted by: amethyst [Member] On: February 21, 2004 )

Ahhhh
This is so CUTE! You kept the rhyming scheme well, apart from 'funny' and 'Benny'. Reading it made me smile - thank you for that. Is Benny an Old English sheepdog? 'Cos English is the best (big, big cheesy, teasy grin!!) You've written from the heart here and it shows in every word.
Say 'whuff' to Benny from me, he'll understand.
Ciao
Paul the (d)Ogg

( Posted by: Ogg [Member] On: February 22, 2004 )

Cute
I liked it its so cute ......

( Posted by: RightingIt [Member] On: February 22, 2004 )





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