There Is Danger In Love
by tinsoldier (Member) - published: April 4, 2009
Word Count: 232 Word Bytes: 1424 Viewed: 131 times
Category - Poetry
© Copyright by tinsoldier

(1 votes)

Rating	Rated by

8	OchaniLele

You must login to vote

There is danger in love, and it lies in the will
Of one so drunk in the rumored possibility of greatness
Love then gets enlarged and all its bridges burned,
Not knowing nor ever allowing a lesser life resumed;
Yea, I once trod a realm of desires so defined
Where men were perceived as lost in the submission
To love's wildest demands, slaving and encountering,
Only to be strangely cited for gallantry unknown
By a fearsome order completely distant and familiar,
Rising against fortified walls of condemnation.

But let me be drunk in love than sober in safety
Or wade in heaven's marsh than stride in hell's atrium!
For what joy is there in love if it cannot be
Paid in death?—My love is dead until it dies in love!

Why does man favor prosperity over the hope of triumph?—
Would he not court the danger that is love so that
What makes love glorious also befits its pursuit?
And if a morbid fall comes in the stead of glory,
What of it? Tell me love is too small to fight for
And you shall hear the last of it. Love mayn't be all—
But all that one seeks to venture in pure love shall
Withstand all; still love desires all, and shall
Consume even hearts that day and night bleed sulphur,
And in the face of all odds be made complete.

Related Items

Pequeño Soldado (Little Soldier)

God Thence

The Ghost of Bampfylde

Haiku: Smuggled Love

Haiku: London when he cries

Haiku: The Carnival Prince

Haiku: dark enclosed...

Season

Our Friendship

Pepi's Dress

More by tinsoldier »

Comments

The following comments are for "There Is Danger In Love"
by tinsoldier

@ tinsoldier
I like this poem, I really do; however, your last two lines bother me because of one word -- sulphur.

In my opinion, if you omit that one word, the poem has a better feel. Like this:

Consume even hearts that day and night bleed,
And in the face of all odds be made complete.

But my opinion means nothing. I am curious, however, what that word brought to the poem for you?

Ochani

( Posted by: OchaniLele [Admin] On: April 4, 2009 )

Sulphuric indeed
Hi Ochani! Thanks for dropping by. To be frank I left the word 'sulphur' alone despite several temptations during composition to leave it out. In my opinion the word did stand out (you've shown that to be true) but my eschatological view of man's destiny must have had the upper hand in this. Although I haven't the intention to make this poem a vehicle of my eschatology, the last lines of the poem were meant to broaden the trajectory of the kind of love that could reach even the most stubborn of hearts, if you may.

Sorry if I hadn't described fully the kind of picture I hope to paint with the word. But I'm glad this piece spoke to you somehow.

( Posted by: tinsoldier [Member] On: April 5, 2009 )

@ tinsoldier
In that case, you accomplished your goal . . . which makes the whole thing brilliant. Obviously, my reaction was what you wanted, and it's hard to make a reader react a certain way.

I feel so cheap! I've been M-A-N-I-P-U-L-A-T-E-D!

Ochani

(just kidding about feeling cheap!)

( Posted by: OchaniLele [Admin] On: April 5, 2009 )

@OchaniLele
You spoke too highly of my ability. I cannot say that I have consciously sought to elicit a certain reaction from my readers with this one. This poem came in the aftermath of a recent loss and I merely felt a need to encapsulate what was bequeathed to me through quite a painful assimilation.

Still I would improve on the second line thus:

Of one so drunk in the rumour of greatness

"Rumored possibility" sounds superfluous.

( Posted by: tinsoldier [Member] On: April 7, 2009 )

Add Your Comment

You Must be a member to post comments and ratings. If you are NOT already a member, signup now it only takes a few seconds!

All Fields are required

Login:
Password:

Staff Blogs: